A few days ago I was talking with a new good friend of mine.
He is a podcaster and coach who decided to quit his job without any “Plan B”
and dive fully into the world of entrepreneurship. He has started to gain some
great momentum and is delivering massive value to the planet but he ran into a
road block. He is not generating enough revenue to pay back his debts and
maintain the quality of life he is striving to create.
He knew my story of leaving a job I hated to work at a dream
job, while building my own dream company on the side. He wanted to know how I
did it and if I had any recommendations on how he could do it. We dove into the
conversation and he told me about an opportunity that sounded fairly interesting
to him, but had a great deal of unknowns around it. He would have to change
location, time zone, and dive into a totally new area in a totally new country.
So I asked him a simple question. “What would you want to do ideally if you had
to get a job while building your business on the side?”
He began listing off criteria: location independent, a progressive
company, would help him learn skills that would aid him in developing his own
company, and so on. I then asked, “What companies that you know of fit this
description?” He quickly rattled off 3-4 companies and said how interesting it
would be to work at any of those places.
I asked if he had contacted any of them or checked their
available job openings and he said he had not. Prior to us speaking he had
never even considered the possibility of working for a dream company, a company
that totally excited him, and gave him both the funds and freedom to build his
business on the side.
I use this example to illustrate a very clear example of the
quality of the questions we ask in our lives. Your heart and brain are an
incredible problem solving duo. Whatever questions you put in front of them,
they will work to solve them as best they can. This works both in the positive
and the negative.
“How can I get a job?” May seem like a good question,
because the goal is to get a job right? Well if you want ANY job at ANY company
with ANY working conditions and ANY work/life balance, your brain will find an
answer to that question.
Let’s reframe that same situation and say you asked, “How
can I find an amazing job for a dream company that excites me, engages me, and
will help me embrace my unique gifts to make a meaningful contribution to this
company and the world. A company that challenges me to grow and connects me
with incredible people from all over the world. A company that leaves me the
freedom to spend time with family, friends and develop a social life outside of
my working hours. A company that compensates me in a way that allows me to live
how I’ve always dreamt. How can I work for a company like that?”
Guess what, your brain and heart are going to go to work on
that question as well and work to find an answer.
What if the answer isn’t readily available? Well lucky for
us, we live in the internet age. Time to do some research. Wouldn’t you rather
spend 20 minutes, 2 hours, or even a week researching a dream company and a
dream role to apply for rather than just defaulting to the jobs you currently
know exist that may not connect with the passion in your heart?
So what happened with my friend after our talk? The next
day he got back to me and said he checked one of the dream companies and
they had a role that was perfect for him and would check more of his boxes for
a dream job than he ever thought possible before. All it took was two simple
things. A few reframed questions to shift his perspective and him being willing
to take action.
I want to ask you, where are you asking questions that scare
you, tear you down, or disempower you?
Questions like:
- What’s wrong with me?
- Why am I so stupid?
- Why am I so disconnected with my spouse/significant other?
- Why am I so fat?
- Why do I always mess things up?
- Why can’t I get over my fear of getting to know new people?
With all of these questions your conscious and subconscious
minds are going to go out and look for proof for whatever questions you ask.
They will go and seek out every shred of evidence to help answer the question
you have posed. Let’s see what would happen if you asked the same core
questions differently.
Questions reframed (respectively):
- What do I want to improve about myself and how can I get started?
- Where do I want to grow in my life and learn more and what is one thing I could do today to start that process?
- How can I connect more deeply with my spouse/significant other?
- How can I love my body no matter how it looks but also work to get healthier every day?
- What have I done in the past that I never want to do again? What can I do next time I am faced with that situation to respond in a way that empowers me?
- How can I start getting over my fear of meeting new people today?
Now imagine your heart and brain going to work on this set
of questions. They get excited and engaged to take on exciting problems that
empower you to help you become the person you know you are meant to be, the
person that already exists inside you that you are working to let out.
Questions are huge. Not only HOW we ask them but WHAT we are
asking ourselves makes all the difference. The mindsets we approach life with
are so critical in determining how we go through our day to day experience. A
positive mindset doesn’t mean that everything is going to be perfect; it just
means that when things go wrong, you’ll be able to pick yourself up, dust
yourself off, and get back out there making your unique mark on the world.
I will leave you with this, what is one question you can
reframe today to empower you to take action and step into your greatness? Reframe
it and take that action. Right now. Don’t wait for tomorrow, do it right now
and start showing yourself the love you so deeply deserve. Do this and life
will quickly look brighter than ever before.
I love you guys, dream big, take action, I promise it’s
worth it.
Founder of Overcoming Graduation LLC
Creator and Host of the Overcoming Graduation Podcast
Author of the #1 Amazon Best Seller, The First
Step
P.S. If there is any way I can be of service to you, please
feel free to contact me at Brian@OvercomingGraduation.com.
If you would like to learn more about participating in my Coaching Program,
visit OvercomingGraduation.com/coaching
. I love connecting with exciting engaged people from all over the world!
yep, gotta do your market research
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